So I was reading what Denise wrote about her grades being finally in
(Congrats!)... and her post directed me to her fellow Wolverine, Heidi and her post about the code of silence surrounding grades at law school -- and her feeling of waiting for the other shoe to drop
. I completely agree with her.
For the entirety of his whole law school experiment, I seem to have been waiting for my come-uppance too. My completely irrational rantings
for my final, final grades was a manifestation of my incredility at them. I mean -- if they'd been that good, then that means that something equally as bad would come my way, right?
Well, it didn't, and I am going graduate.
And while I jumped with glee and told very close friends what my grades were, I never told anyone in my class. You just don't. do. that. But I'm going to play around the edges here. Now that I'm out of the game, maybe it doesn't matter so much.
In going to law school, I decided that there were a few benchmarks that I wanted -- and did manage -- to hit, and I'm proud of that.
First, I wanted to graduate without embarrassing myself or, more importantly, the people who wrote letters of recommendation for me. I think I managed that.
Second, I wanted to graduate without ever receiving a C. I came close, but I did manage to do that.
Third, I wanted to graduate with a B+ average. At GULC, B+ is something around the middle to high point of the curve. In other words, mediocrity. I achieved mediocrity.
And as I progressed through law school and figured out what I could/couldn't do, I started to develop some more goals. In my last year of school, a target graduation GPA started to form. I realized that I was within spitting distance of graduating with honors -- and so I started to think that maybe I should go for that.
Crazy, crazy, crazy thoughts. But they loomed in the back of my mind, especially after my third year with only one semester to go.
But I never let the grade game drive me nutz (until this last semester). One of the coping mechanisms I had had was that I gave up the grade race early. You may not believe that from some of my posts, but I decided early on that, within a certain range, I wasn't going to care too much about my GPA. I knew that my GPA wouldn't make or break my career with all my work experience and other achievements. And actually, I also adopted that stance partially because my first semester grades were really. REALLY. bad. Just plain ugly.
While I know that (most) everyone's first year grades aren't what they want them to be (except perhaps 15%, as noted by Scoplaw
), mine made me cry, something I did only twice in law school about school... (but that's another post, too). I was so disappointed.
Now, on the other end of the law school experience, I am proud of my GPA, and I really think that if I had stressed over it, I never would have been able to achieve it. The consternation would have been counter-productive. Plus, I think enjoying the classes allowed me to do better.
I'm living proof that grades aren't everything... I'll graduate on Wednesday with a respectable GPA but I still don't have a job!
(but I will...)
(and I'll graduate with a GPA that is even higher than I had ever considered I might achieve... yay!)